November 10th: Chayay Sarah
THIS WEEK IN THE TORAH
Rabbi David E. Ostrich
The Bible may be full of miracle stories, but, for regular people in Biblical times, the incidence of miracles and revelations was probably close to zero. Think about the editing process of the Bible. Whether the choices were made by God or by human editors—or by both, the good stories were chosen for their inspirational or educational impact. Abraham, whose Torah story concludes this week, was a veteran of quite a few revelations and miracles, but even he, in his 175 years, spent most of the time leading a regular life. As for the rest of the people in Biblical times, they might have gone years or entire lifetimes without hearing God’s Voice or experiencing the supernatural. Pretty much like us.
For regular people living regular lives—and even for Patriarchs, Matriarchs, and Prophets most of the time, the day-to-day Presence of God is manifested in regular ways—in the processes of nature, in our relationships with other people, and in cosmic insights that we occasionally glimpse. One suspects that there were times when they, like we, yearned for a more engaged relationship with the Divine, and thus there was worship, there were prayers, and there was hope. Our weekly Torah portion gives us an interesting example.
In Genesis 24, after Sarah’s death and burial, Abraham feels the need to get a wife for his son Isaac. Being too old to go on the errand himself, he sends his senior servant.
“…do not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites among whom I dwell, but go to the land of my birth and get a wife for my son Isaac.” (Genesis 24.3-4)
(The Midrash says that this servant is Eliezer of Damascus, but the Torah does not give the servant’s name. Eliezer had been Abraham’s main servant before Isaac was born, but we do not know if he is still alive or still able to make a journey of this distance and difficulty.)
The servant assembles a caravan of camels, retainers, and gifts and journeys to the land of Abraham’s birth. When he arrives in Aram-Naharaim in northern Mesopotamia, a town where some of Abraham’s relatives live, he rests by the town well and prays a very particular prayer:
“O Lord, God of my master Abraham, grant me good fortune this day, and deal graciously with my master Abraham: here I stand by the spring as the daughters of the townsmen come out to draw water. Let the maiden to whom I say, ‘Please, lower your jar that I may drink,’ and who replies, ‘Drink, and I will also water your camels’—let that be the one whom You have decreed for Your servant Isaac.” (Genesis 24.12-14)
As soon as he finishes praying, this is exactly what happens! Rebekah, daughter of Bethuel and great-niece of Abraham, appears, is approached by the servant, and responds just as the prayer requests. She is the one, and, after a family meeting with Abraham’s servant, Rebekah departs her old life to become the wife of Isaac and a Matriarch of the eventual Jewish People.
Would that our prayers be answered so quickly! Would that our prayers be answered so precisely! Then again, this story was selected for the Bible because it is so unusual. For most of us and our prayers, I can repeat the advice of Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, “Praying to God is not like Domino’s Pizza—guaranteed delivery in thirty minutes.” Prayer is a different kind of encounter.
When we call a pizza business to order food, the restaurant is responsive because it wants to trade its pizza for our money. What is God’s motivation in the prayer process? Is there something in our prayers that can make them worthy of being answered? Lots of desires rush into our minds, but which of them are things we would really place before the Lord of the Universe and expect Divine agreement and acceptance?
This is the subject of a Kabbalistic passage traditionally chanted before the open Ark during the Shabbat morning Torah service.
“Beh ana rachetz…/
In God alone do we put our trust, and to God alone do we utter praise.
O may it be Your will to open our hearts to Your Torah and
v’tash’lim mish’alin d’libi v’liba d’chol amach Yis’ra’el l’tav ul’chayin v’lish’lam/
to fulfill the worthy desires of our hearts and of the hearts of all Your people Israel:
for good, for life, and for peace.” (Zohar, Vayak’hel 369a)
It does not make any difference to Domino’s if you order mushrooms or extra cheese, but, when we make prayer requests, one figures that God’s values are going to affect God’s willingness to respond. This notion is behind Rabban Gamliel’s advice in Pirke Avot (2.4):
“Make God’s will your will, so that God will do your will as though it is God’s.”
Though we might like to be able to manipulate God’s will, the only manipulation here is what we can do with our own attitudes—bringing them into alignment with the values and aspirations that God enjoins upon us. When we effect this attitudinal transformation, then the prayers we pray will be godly—and we can find a measure of reception from the Holy One.
Though there is a tendency to think of prayer as transactional—as a give and take between humans and God, the reality of prayer is more relational. Prayer brings us closer to God—and allows God better and closer access to us and our sensibilities. Miracles may come occasionally—as in the story about Abraham’s servant and Rebekah, but the usual process of prayer is a matter of drawing closer to God and godliness—and letting God into our hearts.
Let me conclude with a concatenation (a liturgical piece composed of verses from a variety of religious texts) about the process and potential of prayer. You may recognize it from page 48 of our prayerbook Siddur B’rit Shalom:
“The Lord is near to all who call—to all who call out in truth.”
“Where is God? Wherever we open our hearts.”
“The purpose of prayer is to leave us alone with God.”
“But there is no room for God in those who are full of themselves.”
How can we know if our prayers are answered?
“When you rise from your prayers a better person,
then surely have your prayers been answered.”
(Sources: Psalm 145, Reb Mendel of Kotzk, Rabbi Leo Baeck, The Baal Shem Tov, and George Meredith)